[ April Fools ]

[poeticprivilege]

April Fool's Day was a great day of mischief and japery, and while Kalvin would hardly consider himself a prankster, he could never, ever pass up an occasion to stir up a few laughs.

So that was how he found himself sprawled out on the floor of the library, dressed up just enough to be identifiable as a teacher (slacks instead of jeans, a plain black tank top, his hair slicked back and minimum make-up). A step-ladder lay toppled over at his feet, books from the top-shelf scattered willy-nilly all over the floor, part of a pen stuck to his forehead with fake blood dripping down the side of his face.

Needless to say, it wouldn't be a stretch to call his sense of humor a touch on the morbid side. Poke him and see what happens?

Comments

[easytoread]

He didn't think too much of it upon first glance. His eyes first set on the step-ladder and next to the books that lay scattered about the floor. Well, at the very least, no one would even have to guess what happened. An accident like that wasn't a very uncommon occurrence, and it shouldn't cause much injury. Still, just in case, he wanted to check on the victim.

"Are you all ri—" he started, but his words stopped short when he realized two things. The first was that he recognized this person, but— No, that wasn't important. In his forehead there was... a pen!? And he was bleeding! Falling from such a height, was that sort of injury even possible!?

No, this wasn't the time to worry about things like that. Pulling out his cell phone, he quickly started to dial 911.

[poeticprivilege]

It was fortunate then, that Kalvin was lying on his back, opened eyed, and could see the phone being whipped out. A successful call to 911 would have pretty much ruined what he thought was a great joke, and he couldn't let that happen.

"Whoa, hey, it's cool!" he yelped, jerking upright, the pen wobbling a bit as he moved. "I'm okay, dude, seriously, put the phone down."

[easytoread]

Ritsu jumped back immediately, nearly dropping his phone at first, but instead he clutched it tighter as he held it to his chest where he could feel his heart beating rapidly. The victim who should have been unconscious just spoke to him, after all, and sprang back to life as if nothing had happened at all.

Or did... nothing happen at all? Upon closer inspection, should that pen be moving like that? Could this have been a joke? He wasn't sure what to make of it at all, but he wouldn't have his answers without asking the questions first. Closing his cell phone and successfully terminating the connection, he took a deep breath before continuing.

"Are you having trouble with the police?" he questioned somewhat dryly. After all, that was what prompted a jumpy reaction from the other. Wouldn't someone normally want medical treatment in this sort of situation?

[poeticprivilege]

"Uh, no, but if you call an ambulance over a prank, then I will." Not to mention with the headmistress, oof. Really didn't feel like getting fired over a joke. "I mean, it's April Fool's and all, but the last time I checked, getting prank calls when you're in the life-saving business isn't exactly funny."

[easytoread]

"April Fool's...?" he replied with obvious irritation. Mostly, he was mad at himself for getting so worked up when it was nothing but a joke. Rather, he felt that there were subjects that shouldn't be joked about, and this happened to fall under that category. But he was aware that his tastes were going to differ from others, so the best thing he could do was just let it go, even if it still bothered him. For now, he'd set his attention elsewhere.

"All right, I get it. You fooled me," he admitted, still sounding decidedly unamused as he shifted his attention to the scattered books. He sighed as he started picking them up; replacing them was going to be a pain, but it wouldn't be fair to leave it to the librarian, after all.

[poeticprivilege]

"Yeah, April Fool's. Also known as All Fool's Day. Or April's Fish in France. Happens every year, all around the world, kind of a just for shits and giggles thing, yanno? And it's not like this was aimed specifically at you."

Jeeeeeeez, what a spoil sport. Kalvin could tell that the other teacher was less than thrilled with him, but he didn't see what the big deal was. No one was hurt, and no one was in trouble. It was just bit of fun.

and the spoil sport was picking up his books. "Hey! What are you doing with those? I'm not done with them yet!"

[easytoread]

He didn't care for the explanation, and he didn't care that he wasn't specifically targeted. It didn't change the fact that he worried seriously over a practical joke.

"Please refrain from using the library as a personal playground," he lectured calmly as he began returning the books to their proper shelves. Ahh, there really were so many of them. And there wasn't any guarantee that they wouldn't end up back on the floor again, was there?

[poeticprivilege]

"Hey, I got permission!" Wow, who did Ritsu think he was? He was an English teacher, for crying out loud! He loved books! He respected books! There wasn't a drop of fake blood on them, and they weren't any more ruffled than usual. "I'm not some dumb hick who just barged in here and threw the books on the ground! Hell, the Librarian even said they'd go along with it if a student came running for them!"

[easytoread]

"Permission?" he echoed back, surprised to hear it. He paused in his task to look back at him for a moment. At the very least, he didn't seem to think he'd done anything so terrible, and... If Ritsu thought on it some more, perhaps it wasn't. Maybe he was only upset because he had fallen for it.

No, no! He couldn't let himself get swept into that line of thinking so easily! But... If he had received permission and even the Librarian was all right with it... Wouldn't that mean that Ritsu was the one being too sensitive? The possibility was out there, so maybe he should sort of... apologize.

"At any rate," he continued, turning away as he resumed reshelving the books, "I'd like it if you would consider the feelings of the person who happens upon your 'joke' in the future."

It didn't come out as much of an apology as he had somewhat intended.

[borntolose]

Eddie was an experienced veteran of horror movies, and he knew a set-up when he saw one. It was the pen that did it, really - he'd witnessed his fair share of real violence and accidents, too, and they never looked like this. Though he had to admit, the blood wasn't too bad, and Kalvin had posed himself well.

The thock of his boot heels on the floor announced his arrival, and the groundskeeper crouched down next to the 'body', glancing around to make sure no one was in visual range.

"Bloody hell, more fucking garbage to take out," he complained, then reached out, found one of the teacher's nipple rings through the tank top, pinched it and twisted.

[poeticprivilege]

As a joke, it was only meant to be realistic enough to fool people on the first glance. The pen, and the fake wound holding it in place, were also fabulous, no matter how unlikely they were. It was just an excuse to get out the fake blood, anyway. He knew it wasn't likely in the slightest bit.

It was also really hard not to look and giggle when Eddie came up. He really didn't expect to fool him, they had talked about gore and horror movies on their 'date,' after all, but he figured he could at least expect some fun.

What he wasn't expecting was the titty twister.

He let out a screech that was part pain, mostly indignant, and swiped at Eddie's face with his nails. "You asshole!"

[borntolose]

Eddie jerked back as the hand came up, and the nails only caught him on the chin, but he ended up going back on his ass ... sniggering heavily. "Fucking worth it."

[poeticprivilege]

While Eddie sat on his butt and laughed, Kalvin took the opportunity to climb onto his lap and start slugging his shoulders, punctuating each punch with an insult. "Jerk! Buttsmear! Ogre! Brute! What did that nipple ever do to you?"

[borntolose]

Oh, well, that was just an obvious open invitation. The groundskeeper wrapped an arm around Kalvin's waist, and then promptly grabbed the ring in the neglected nipple and twisted it, too, grinning.

[poeticprivilege]

Which, of course, elicited a squeal from Kalvin, who promptly leaned in and bit Eddie's neck in retaliation.

[borntolose]

The big man hissed, which turned into a laughing groan halfway through. He tugged at the ring a little harder, his fingers digging into Kalvin's hip. "You really want to do this here, princess?" he teased, because he sure as hell didn't mind, as long as some admin staff didn't wander by. It might be fun to flip the teacher onto his back ... or hell, stomach ... between the tall shelves of books. He'd never had much else use for libraries, anyway.

[poeticprivilege]

Kalvin moaned into his neck, arching up into his fingers. Part of him did, yes, want to do this here, but the part of him that loved books was insisting that was a bad idea, and disrespectful to boot. He huffed in annoyance, punching Eddie's shoulder again, but didn't bother to move his head - he stopped biting him, though.

"You started it, dick."

[borntolose]

"I wasn't the one what was lying here with a pen in my head," Eddie argued, and turned his own head, taking advantage of the fact that Kalvin had stopped biting to nudge his head to the side and bite him right back, on the side of the throat, digging his uneven teeth in with a little growl.

[poeticprivilege]

Rolling his eyes, he kicked Eddie in the shin - lightly - and buckled his pants, then heaved himself onto his feet.

"Well, yeah, I do, but like," he paused brushing a hand through his hair and grinning sheepishly, mostly to himself. "I didn't actually think you'd go for it. Figured you'd be all "Fuck no, I ain't a woman, I ain't putting no dick in my mouth!" I mean, you're the one who's like, all gender stereotypes."

[borntolose]

"And you're the one what keeps making assumptions about what I will and won't do, and what I think about shit," Eddie pointed out, smirking. "A bloke gives a better blow than a bint most days, least if he knows what the fuck he's doing."

He pulled himself to his feet as well, rubbing absently at his half hard cock through his jeans. "It don't come free, though."

[poeticprivilege]

"Oh, whatever," he huffed, rolling his eyes and putting his hands on his hips. So he made assumptions. Eddie needed to stop being so stereotypical.

"Yeah, no duh. That's why we're going to my room, where I've got a nice big bed we can sixty-nine on," he scoffed, eyes flicking down to Eddie's hand. Classy, really. "Or are you looking for payment in the form of whiskey?"

[borntolose]

"I've got whiskey at home. Don't got blowjobs, though," Eddie said, decision clearly made. "Come on, love, show me this fucking bed."

And then he stepped in and gave Kalvin's ass a friendly squeeze of encouragement. All class, definitely.

[poeticprivilege]

About this time, most people would probably ask themselves what it was they saw in Eddie. The thing was, this was exactly what he saw in Eddie. He liked it cheap and easy, and oh so filthy, and he was not ashamed one bit.

Even if he did sigh and roll his eyes in an exaggerated, put-upon matter. But when he turned away, he wore a smirk, and when he walked, he put a little swing in his hips, deliberately wagging his ass where the other man could see it.

It was just a short trip across campus, then up to the senior dorms, his teacher's dorm a bit bigger, roomier, but still sparsely furnished. Sure, there were band and horror movie posters up on the walls, and he had a pretty nice entertainment center set up, and wow, he really ought to pick the clothes up off his floor, but that was about as personal as it got.

He stopped at the entertainment center first, turning on some music (The White Stripes), before heading over to the bed and sprawling out on it, legs spread and arms over his head.

"Why don't you come over here and give me some sugar, Poppa Bear," he purred, running a hand down his chest and abdomen, stopping at the top of his pants to pop the top button.

[borntolose]

Eddie squinted dubiously at the stereo, but if there was one thing that was sacrosanct in his mind, it was a man's music in his own home. And the choice could have been a whole lot worse, he supposed. Anyway, he had other things to concentrate on. Like the really fine piece of tail all spread out and tasty on the bed.

He sauntered over, pulling his t-shirt off over his head as he did and bearing the broad, hairy chest that made Kalvin's pet name for him so accurate. One knee braced on the bed, his eyes lewdly devouring the teacher's lean body, he reached out and pulled down the other man's zip, then unceremoniously gave his trousers a hard yank, to strip them from the younger man. Eddie didn't believe much in teasing and drawing things out - that was for the other person to do.

[poeticprivilege]

Be thankful he hadn't left his Nine Inch Nails CD in, Eddie. Anyway, it was just to cover any noises they made in case students went by.

A lazy grin spread over his face as the other man approached, his pulse starting to quicken in anticipation, his hands eagerly reaching for Eddie's chest. He loved to run his fingers through the coarse hair, lightly curling his fingertips to twist and tug on it. It was just so much fun to play with, and of course, wasn't far from the sensitive nubs of the other man's nipples.

He gave them a little tweak as his pants were yanked down, arching his hips up off the bed to facilitate the action. His boxers went with them, leaving his lower half exposed, and causing his cock to bob up and slap his stomach as it was freed.